"Ill-dressed, pasty-faced, and racially arrogant; cramped, spotty, and joyless" — that's how Barack Obama portrays Britons in his memoir Dreams from My Father. This is quite a different attitude toward the British than any other post-WWII president. George Bush, who fought alongside the British in the war, believed that when the world is in crisis there is only one ally America can rely on. Bill Clinton spent time in Oxford as a Rhodes scholar and can speak the language of Third Way Blairism without a hint of an accent. George W. Bush, who went straight to Tony Blair after 9/11, obviously inherited his father's anglophilia. But when a man sitting next to Obama on plane headed to Nairobi casually remarks about the "godforsaken countries" in Africa, one begins to understand his dislike for the British. "I was just angry," writes Obama, "because of his easy familiarity with me, his assumption that I, as an American, even a black American, might naturally share in his dim view of Africa."
Casual racism isn't the only cause of Obama's aversion to the British — a brutal history of rapes, whippings, and pillages might have more to do with it. His grandfather was tortured for two years by colonial British authorities for his involvement in the Mau Mau insurgency. The colonial officers were so brutal to the insurgents, that veterans are currently seeking reparations. They still bear the scars from the rape, beatings, and other torture they were subject to. One of the leaders in the Mau Mau insurgency summed up his experience: "When the missionaries came to Africa, we had the land, they held the Bible. They taught us to pray with our eyes closed. When our eyes opened, we held the Bible and they had the land." (Sounds textbook British to us.)
With a body count of over 100,000 Kenyans (compared to 32 colonials), one can imagine how barbarous the British must have been. This "inglorious chapter" in British history, as an editorial in The Times put it, has the Brits shaking in their powdered wigs. They've pissed off the soon-to-be most powerful man on Earth to an extent where a simple, "sorry, mate!," won't do. When Obama sees an Englishman, he doesn't see a WWII buddy, he sees a nameless colonial officer looking over a Africa, proud to have brought the guiding light of Western civilization to the African darkness. So what is Britain to do now that their cozy days of curling up on George W. Bush's lap are coming to an end? One thing's for sure, President Obama will not look the other way should they attempt to go back to their barbaric ways.