International Coalition for British Reparations: People of the World, it's Time to get Paid.

Falinge in Rochdale was once a proud textile town filled with busy cotton mills. Today's Falinge is a far cry from its textile-hub past. A recent study has found that 49% of the residents claim that they are too ill to work, and live off government handouts. The other half of the residents (the working ones) complain that those people are being lazy, and simply claim to suffer from difficult-to-diagnose conditions like severe back pain. "Once they get the doctor's sick note it is a gilt-edged passport to a life of lazing around. People just don't have pride or self-respect any more," said Alf Edwards, a working resident.

Besides being home to the highest unemployment rate in the country, Falinge also holds the sixth lowest life expectancy, at 68. This makes absolute sense when one considers that when the cotton mills closed down, asbestos factories replaced them. Once asbestos was exposed as extremely hazardous, those factories closed down. Since the mid '80s, the town has been plagued by high unemployment and disease. We don't understand what all the fuss is about, Falinge sounds like a run-or-the-mill British slum to us.

The Town Where Half The People Are Too Sick To Work

YES, I WOULD LIKE TO SIGN THE PETITION AND GET PAID!