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International Coalition for British Reparations: People of the World, it's Time to get Paid.

Everyone Bash The Brits

02.08.2007 - Chimp Media Monitoring

Someone in Philadelphia is up to mischief. This ad embedded on the website of organisation "International Coalition for British Reparations" attempts to add another nick to the bleeding hearts of those who expect Britain to cough up compensation for every perceived ill the country has inflicted on the world since...whenever (William the Conqueror? Elizabeth I? Victoria?).

I suspect that this campaign was put together by someone who failed geography at school because the list of Britain's victims includes the Scots and the Welsh who are - ahem - British. Yes, Philadelphian geography numpties, believe it or not, Britain is the collective name for Scotland, Wales and England.

And I'd like someone in Philadelphia to start the reparations ball rolling by finding someone to carry the can for using British troops for target practice.

Oh shit - I can see this turning into a rant already. Well, being baptised into the Greek Orthodox church I feel that if reparations are going to become a trend, then the Catholic Church should give me some cash for the stress caused by the Fourth Crusade, that the Turks should pay up for the sack of Constantinople and that Mount Olympus should be razed to the ground because Zeus once ravished a shepherdess whose DNA I carry.

There's a petition on this miserable site, and I've signed it. I feel abused by decades of mis-government by the likes of Margaret Thatcher and Tony Blair, and I want to get my money back before some Frenchman from Agincourt gets his garlicky mitts on it or, even worse, Mel Gibson gets wind of the campaign.

Fuck it, I didn't want to pay for the Iraq war and my pension's screwed.

Anyone else feel like a victim?

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